I’m only 20. And although I often feel ancient (I swear I just had my 10th birthday like 3 seconds ago), I know that I have so much ahead of me. I’m 2 decades into what’s likely to be an 8+ decade journey (yikes it’s 1/4th over), and yet I’ve only had a small taste of what I’m going to experience and accomplish in my lifetime. And if life tastes this good now, I can’t wait to taste the next 60+ years (hopefully it’s as delicious as the bread pudding at Baraco LA).
So much of my life is consumed with worrying about “tomorrow” that I often forget that today is what truly matters. Today is the only real guarantee in life, and (if you want to be super cynical) we really don’t even get that reassurance. It’s more like right now–this moment. I don’t know where I’ll be in 10 days, let alone 10 months. And God forbid you ask me about the next 10 years because I just finished finals and all I’m thinking about is hibernating and trying and repair the irreversible damage I’ve done to my poor, overworked brain (uh, I think they call that learning?). But as for the next 10 minutes, I can tell you that I’ll still be sitting here, pecking away at this keyboard. And that makes me happy. Do the things that make you happy. There’s no healthier or better way to spend this moment than with a smile on your face, next to someone you love. (Cue: someone I love who doesn’t distract me so I can finish this post in comprehensible English… still searching.)
I may not know (exactly) where my life is going or where I will be in the (not so) distant future, but I know that I have a future. And grab your Ray-Bans ladies and gentleman (fashion tip: aviators look cool on just about anyone) because it’s looking pretty bright. And I don’t say that out of arrogance or overconfidence; I say that because I have all the right tools at my fingertips. Now, if I could just learn how to swing that hammer without smashing my fingers…
I go to an incredible university, I have the world’s most supportive parents (read: statement excludes times when you unnecessarily pierce body parts) and nothing but opportunity and possibility ahead of me. If that’s not living the dream, I don’t know what is.
If you had told me then, where I would be now, I would have told you that you were crazy.
In times of high stress (aka finals season and my entire life
this past month since forever) it’s easier to hate school and complain how useless and hard it is instead of appreciating its benefits (see below: yesterday’s post; quite the turn around). But I am so thankful that I even have the opportunity to get the education that I’m getting. Do I feel any smarter than when I first graced South Central, Los Angeles with my presence some two years ago? Not really (don’t tell my parents…), but I chalk that up to A. not being able to see even the most incredible changes within yourself, and B. most of what I’ve learned is intangible. I can’t tell you exactly everything from every chapter of every textbook that I’ve read skimmed (I’m trying to be more honest so I can get on the Nice List), but I can tell you that I’ve learned a hell of a lot about who I am, who I want to be and how to get there.
So as I look back at yet another completed semester at USC (wow, time flies), and as the holidays (far too quickly) approach, it’s only right that I think of all the reasons that I’m #blessed: family, friends and the many ways that love finds its way into my life. But in this moment, I’m most grateful for my right now. I’m grateful for every detail of my life–no matter the size–that will make my life even better tomorrow than it is today (if it’s possible). I’m healthy, I’m happy, and I’m finally home for the holidays. What else could a 20-year-old girl ask for? (Mom, if you’re reading this: A pair of Warby Parker ‘Raglan’ sunglasses in Pearled Tortoise; I’ve got to shade my fragile blue eyes from that future somehow, right?)
I’m also thankful for the cup of coffee that I’m going to have after finishing this workout (the one thing that I’m not thankful for today). It’s not always the most fun thing to do bright and early, but the only way I’ll ever live to see tomorrow is if I take care of myself today. That starts with health, which means my day starts at the gym. Lucky, lucky me.
Get that workout in, count your (innumerable) blessings, shade your precious eyes from your illuminating potential and most importantly: keep doing you.
All my love and thanks for each one of you in my life (or the fact that I somehow end up in your inbox at wee hours of the morning).